So, a few weeks ago I was taking a walk behind the bus station (a fine place for a walk) when a gang of, er, gangsters jumped me. Taking my wallet and my electronic dictionary, they shoved me into a half-full kimchi pot and buried me underground. After about ten days or so my fingernails grew long enough that I was able to claw through the wall of the pot in a matter of days and then dig myself out of my earthen confinement. I just finished taking a shower and clipping my nails and am now sitting in front of my computer because god knows that if I didn’t have my blog, I’d have nothing.

You may be wondering how I was able to survive for so long underground. Well, it just so happens that, in addition to preventing SARS and curing cancer, kimchi also inhibits suffocation. Thank god!