I guess there are a few people out there who do give a rat’s ass about the Miss Universe pageant (won by Miss Japan - Riyo Mori…Miss Korea was the third runner-up). I woke up this morning and checked out the hits for the blog and was surprised to see that the number of visitors yesterday had jumped by over 2000. The majority of them came here through some variety of a search for Miss Korea - Honey Lee. Today there have been over 3000 more visitors than the daily average, and there’s still time left in the day.

I decided that I would be irresponsible to not use the opportunity that has been bestowed upon me - this temporary spike in traffic - to send a message that needs to be heard out to the world.

Viewers of the Miss Universe pageant - those of you who witnessed the speeches and smiles and evening gowns and bikinis and stumbles and falls - sure, it appeared as if the contestants were bosom buddies and all is well in the world (of beauty queens). But did you know that there has been a long-running feud between Miss Korea and Miss Japan?

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The controversy revolves around a special technique involving breast (or “tracts of land” for you Monte Python fans) implants developed by a Western plastic surgeon residing in East Asia. I won’t bore you with the details of the technique, they are not pertinent to the story. What is important is that both Miss Korea and Miss Japan lay claim to being the first to discover the good doctor’s “tracts of land” method. To pay homage to the doc (and themselves) the women decided to give their new “tracts of land” names. Miss Korea called her left one “Dok” and the right one “do”, while Miss Japan refered to her’s as the “Takeshima Tatas”. For awhile, neither made much of the other’s claim of being the first. But then one day they realized the economic benefits and that’s when the “Tastes Great - Less Filling” squabble began. (Wait, that’s another dispute…sorry).

Will the two ever be able to get along? One never knows. Perhaps they will find common ground someday. Why, there have already been signs of agreement between the two women. When asked what they thought of the man who performed their surgeries, Dr. Leopold Liancourt, both answered with a resounding, “(Dr.) Liancourt Rocks!”