The IKKFL* fantasy football league is set to kick off again in a few weeks and the big news so far is the relocation of my team from Yeosu to Anyang. In addition to the move, the team had to choose a new nickname, since the city of Yeosu sued to keep the name “Crack Addicts”. No big, really, since the Addicts severely underachieved last season.

In the process of choosing a new team name, I felt it was important that my team’s mascot be representative of two ideals: tenaciousness and intimidation. I thought to myself, “Who (or what) has let no man or immortal stand in his (or its) way in reaching the pinnacle of his (or its) industry? I also wondered, “Who would most scare the bejeezus out of me if I were to run into him in a dark alley?”

The answer was simple.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Anyang Andres.

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Bring on the competition.

*I can’t remember what “IKKFL” stands for. I think “Inter-Korea Kluster Football League”. That, or “Irresistable Krispy Kreme Fat Loops”.