The Iceberg

Inebriated partiers crowd around the stage to get a better view of the scantily clothed woman gyrating in front of them. Said woman shakes her hips, tosses her hair and spins around to the music thumping through the speakers. Her dance oozes sexuality. Suddenly, as the song approaches its end, the woman lifts her top over her head - exposing her cosmetic surgeon’s handiwork. (Job well done, Dr. Kim). As the audience expresses its approval, the woman – shirt in hand – glides off the stage. Another female contestant walks out; this time with partner in tow. The music starts up again and, unlike the previous dancer, the young couple waste little time disrobing. The man takes off his shirt and lies on the floor and the woman sits on top of him. They squirm around for a few seconds before the woman removes her shirt and bra. After another minute or so of simulated sex the woman stands up. She takes off her shorts and panties and again sits atop the man on the floor – this time in the position of, um, let’s just say it’s a certain number. You know it, the number that every overweight beer-guzzling first baseman in slow-pitch softball leagues wears. The woman removes her partner’s jeans and they proceed with their show. The crowd goes wild.

Sound like another wild night in Hongdae? Think again. This scene occurred in a Korean-style “booking” nightclub in the quiet little town of Yeosu last Friday night. And outside of myself and a co-worker, there was not a single Westerner to be found in the club.

Hongdae, you ain’t got nothin’ on Yeosu.

Here’s a peek at the evening. The video was taken stealthily so…don’t expect too much.

Here is some more footage of some (clothed) sexy dancing Friday night. This video is much clearer.

UPDATE: I should note that there was no orifice to orifice contact during the show. Also, I won’t mention the name of the club, because god knows I don’t want to take even the slightest risk of it being shut down. Viva la Booking Club!

Well, a week has passed and I’ve had time to settle back into my suck-ass routine, so I guess it’s time to report on my experience at the Pentaport Rock Festival.

Last Thursday (July 27th) I hopped on a bus at 10:40 pm for the approximately five-hour journey from Yeosu to Seoul. There wasn’t much rain or traffic until the bus reached Daejeon, so I arrived in Seoul ahead of schedule (around 3:30 am). I took a taxi to Haebangchon and called my friend. The plan was to crash at his place and then head out early to Incheon - more specifically, Song-do - for the Pentaport Rock Festival. As it turned out, we were both psyched about the festival and decided to start the celebration early. We ended up having some vodka and cokes while listening to the new Muse cd (which, by the way, is quite good…check it out when you have a chance). The result being that we didn’t wake up until around 10 am (or was it 11? I can’t remember). Beavis and Butthead rock Korea!

Before embarking on our rock extravaganza, we had a couple of tasks at hand. First was breakfast, or rather, lunch. We went to Gecko’s in Itaewon and ordered a couple burgers and beers. Then, since rain was in the forecast, I browsed a few shops for a water-proof jacket. Finally we were off to Kangnam to catch a bus to the festival.

By the time we arrived at our motel we hadn’t seen anything more than a few sprinkles. We even chose to believe that we noticed the sun peeking through the clouds at one point. We checked into our rooms and I had a quick shower. Alas, when we went back outside, it was raining buckets. My newly purchased water-proof windbreaker was not going to do the trick.

The festival grounds were a mess. In some places we stepped in mud halfway up to our knees. As a result, the crowd on Friday was sparse - but enthusiastic. Cowards (and lushes) that we are, my friend and I found refuge from the rain in a beer tent. We waited for a break in the storm to make our move to one of the shows. We ended up waiting for about two hours. Torrential rain fell from the sky in approximately ten-minute intervals. In between the downpours, Mother Nature teased us with one-minute showers. Each time, just as we were about to leave the tent, the rain picked up again. I kid you not - it was coming down so hard that when it hit the puddles on the ground, water bounced a good three inches up in the air.

Eventually we just said f**k it and went out. The beer might have had something to do with our new found bravery. On our way to the main stage we stopped at a store to buy a couple of plastic “coats” for (I think) 1500 won each. The people selling those things must have made a killing. The first band we saw was a Korean group called Uhn ni nae ee bal gwan (언니네이발관). They were alright. (Unfortunately we missed the Yeah Yeah Yeahs due to our late start.)

The highlight of the first day for me was the Snow Patrol set. Singer/guitarist Gary Lightbody didn’t seem put off by the small crowd and provided an energetic performance. It’s a shame the band had only sixty minutes on stage rather than the ninety minutes given to The Strokes. Not that The Strokes were bad. They just didn’t seem to have as much fun as Snow Patrol and it showed. At least to me. Here’s a short clip of Snow Patrol and The Strokes - mostly Snow Patrol.

I wanted to get more footage of these groups but my camcorder had some moisture problems (go figure) so I had to use my digital camera to shoot the above video.

After Snow Patrol, we decided to skip the Korean band NEXT and run out for dinner before The Strokes concert. I’ve never heard NEXT, but I suspect we didn’t miss much. Song-do was a pretty cool little area - plenty of bars and other entertainment venues, as well as about a hundred motels - but one thing it most definitely needs is more Western-style restaurants. The best we could find was a cheesy “restaurant/coffee shop/bar” style place where the menu featured such tasty items as hamburger steak, pork cutlet, and fish cutlet. I went with the fish cutlet. I can’t remember exactly how it tasted as I was pretty drunk at that point. In fact, I was just drunk enough to leave my cell phone at the restaurant. But fortunately not drunk enough to not remember later where I left it.

DAY TWO

One of the great things about love motels is the boarded up windows. One could sleep until three in the afternoon and wouldn’t know it because it is completely dark in the room. In fact, I woke up late in the morning but it was nice to have a sound night’s sleep after the bus ride/vodka-coke experience the night before.

I met a couple of friends outside the motel and we set off for breakfast. I mentioned earlier that the pickings were slim for western food. There were, however, an abundance of convenience stores around the area. We decided to have one of those pre-made sandwiches - you know them, the ham/tuna fish/shredded cabbage/corn/tomato delights - and a coffee. Unfortunately, it appeared other foreigners got an earlier start than us and had the same craving for breakfast, because we visited at least four different stores and all of them were out of the sandwiches. Who woulda guessed? So we settled for the coffee and went to a Korean restaurant for breakfast. I had galbi-tang while my friends ate seollung-tang. (SIDENOTE: Concerning the coffee - my friends had the “Starbucks in a bottle” variety, while I went for the Caffe Latte Mocha Mild. Two reasons for this: 1. It tastes pretty much the same and is much cheaper; and 2) I refuse to drink Starbucks since its owner - Howard Schultz - sold the Sonics to an out-of-town buyer. Damn you, Howard Schultz!!! Damn you to hell!!!)

Stomachs full, it was time to head to the festival grounds. We purchased our beers (an absolute requirement at all times) and made our way to a tent near the main stage to listen to a Korean band called “Vassline” (their spelling, not mine). Having received a glowing recommendation from his co-worker, my friend considered this group one of the “must-see” shows of the festival. Note to self: take all recommendations from friends’ co-workers with a huge chunk of salt. In two words: Vassline sucked! If you’re a fan of Megadeth-ish thrash metal, then I apologize if this offends and you may in fact enjoy Vassline. Personally, I just can’t get into that kind of music. I was torn between fleeing the scene as quickly as possible and running up on stage to perform the Heimlich on the “singer”. In the end, I noted that I still had plenty of beer remaining and chose to concentrate on polishing it off. Fortunately, Vassline had only a 30-minute set.

Next up was another Korean band called “Crash”. We waited around to see if they’d be an improvement. While not quite as severe as Vassline, they weren’t much better. In the middle of their first “song” they ran into some technical problems and had to cut it short. This gave us our chance to escape. We darted for the second stage, where we listened to a pretty decent Korean band called “Beautiful Days” and a not-so-decent band called “Pils Day”. The second band’s singer was the walking definition of “느끼”. You can see a bit of both bands in the following video. Oh yeah! We also drank more beer.

The guy in black at the end of the previous video was a member of the festival stage construction crew. He’s from Australia, a happy-go-lucky sort of guy, and seemed to be living a enjoyable life traveling around with the bands. He’s also pretty compelling evidence that Michael Hutchence of INXS is alive and (mostly) well. We asked for his take on the bands performing that night (Black Eyed Peas and Placebo) and he told us that the Black Eyed Peas didn’t put on a very good live show. Turns out he was wrong. But it was good that he said that because I lowered my expectations of them going in. More on that later.

It was around this time that we discovered that there was some very tasty food being sold at the festival. Particularly the pizza, barbequed chicken, and barbequed sausages. This was an extremely valuable revelation as it meant we no longer had cause to leave the festival grounds. We ate and drank our fill and then took in a little of the Japanese band “Dragon Ash”. My friend wasn’t completely sold on them but I liked them. Except for the goofball dancers that were part of their show.

After Dragon Ash it was back to the food area for more pizza, chicken, and sausages. My memory is a little foggy, but I think it was also around this time that we started on the Jack and Cokes. We listened to the bulk of the Psy show while having dinner, but did manage to see the last five minutes or so. No doubt I’ll receive a lot of grief from Korean teen-agers (should they ever stumble across this blog) for what I’m about to say, but here goes: I had heard good things about Psy’s live performances. Something along the lines of, “Psy’s concert is one of the best in Korea.” If this is true, then I won’t be going to any Korean concerts soon. Compared to the headliners, Psy came across as very amateurish, in my humble opinion. One good thing though - at least he employed sexy female dancers. Take THAT Dragon Ash! (I didn’t get any video of them though. Sorry.)

At 7:30 it was time for the Black Eyed Peas. Though this was a rock festival, the Peas were easily the most recognizable name to Koreans and as a result attracted the largest crowd. I like their music and was eager to see them, though, as I mentioned earlier, I wasn’t expecting too much. But their show was good. Emphasis on show. I personally don’t think their music is well-suited to a live outdoor performance, but they had a lot of fun and knew exactly how to get the crowd fired up - incorporating “Korea” into songs and monologues, praising Korean women (”Korean girls are the prettiest Asian girls”), and of course, chanting the ubiquitous “Dae-han-min-guk”. They certainly knew their audience.

One more point to note about the Peas: That Fergie is a nimble little minx. Yeow!

As you likely have already gathered by now, I am not the steadiest of hand when shooting video. Particularily at this festival. I debated with myself (as I often do…I’m a master debater) whether to devote effort to capturing great video shots or to just have a great time (read: lots of alcohol comsumption). In the end, having a great time took precedence. This is just a blog, afterall. So I ask for your understanding. Also, please understand that the mic on my camera sucks and therefore much of the audio is distorted (especially on the videos to follow).

To be continued…

Thank god I’m on semi-vacation. At the time of this writing, I had rolled out of bed about two hours prior, actually woke up one hour prior, and started recalling the events of last night about five minutes prior. So here we go:

My co-worker and I arrived at the Wa Bar at around 9 pm last night. Remembering the line of people waiting outside of the bar at the last World Cup, I worried that we’d be unable to find a seat. My worries were unnecessary. The bar was only about half-full and we grabbed the same spot where we watched the previous night’s American debacle (oh yeah, and the Australia game too). I had mixed feelings about this. It was nice to possess such a prime location - facing the screen and right in front of the “beers in ice” - but I immediately sensed that this year’s World Cup atmosphere wasn’t going to rival that of 2002. A text message from a friend in Seoul saying, and I quote, “It’s fucking bonkers here. City Hall has been packed since 5.” had me once again questioning my decision to move to Yeosu. The mood in the bar was much like the mood overall in Yeosu, somewhat subdued. In 2002 I’d estimate that about 90% of the population was wearing red, but here the number was more like 20%. See for yourself:

I had some time to kill before the kickoff*, so I started digging through the ice to see what was available for consumption when I stumbled across this:

DNA in a bottle. I contemplated the ramifications of this and cursed Hwang Woo-suk, then decided that - despite my numerous flaws - I would stick with my own DNA and ordered a draft.

9:45. As game time approached the bar slowly started filling up and a few more patches of red appeared. More than a few smiles, but not a single Dae-Han-Min-Guk (DHMK) thus far. Perhaps the biggest surprise of the World Cup.

Game time. The bar was now nearly full. The only two remaining places were located directly across from me, which turned out to be serendipitous, for moments later two very lovely young ladies whom you will see in a moment strolled into the bar and occupied those very seats. Maybe Yeosu isn’t so bad after all.

Early in the game I remember thinking that it reminded me a lot of the U.S. game. Korea did well to control the ball but couldn’t create opportunities. The only difference was that they weren’t battling from behind early in the game. About twenty minutes in I turned to my friend and asked if there had been any shots on goal to that point. I think there hadn’t. The game was quite boring, frankly, and so were the patrons in the bar. No shrieks from girls whenever a Korean defender cleared the ball. Only one feeble attempt by some girls near the television to start a DHMK chant. And no looks from the girls in front of me.

Damn!

Togo scored their goal around the thirtieth minute. The mood in the bar shifted from complacency to anxiety. At least now there was some sort of energy. I could sense things starting to build up by the time halftime rolled around. Ah yes. Halftime. That is when the night truly began. The most boisterous individual of a group of nice chaps sitting near us (and next to the two girls) decided it was time to liven up the crowd, “Everybody!!! We need to give power to our team! One, two, three, let’s go! DAE-HAN-MIN-GUK!!!” There it was. The crowd came alive. Nothing like nerves and alcohol to stir the emotions. Better yet, the two girls finally turned away from the television and we made eye contact. One of them - I’d describe her as a poor man’s Jeon Ji-hyun - smiled and I could see she was mustering up the courage to say something. You all know that look. The “prepare the word order, I can do it, it’s going to be so fun, here it comes, one-two-three SPEAK” look. Sure enough, she did it. “Hi! What’s your name? Where are you from?” BINGO!

As the second half rolled around, I suggested to our new male friends that we all knock back a 500cc glass of beer should Korea score a goal. They were keen, and so were the two girls. “We can do it too,” they pronounced. Fair enough. I wasn’t going to argue with them. Here is a photo of my new World Cup viewing partners (sans Jeon Ji-hyun, I’ll explain her absence later.)

Ahn Jung-hwan entered the game at the start of the second half and I made the unfortunate discovery that a friend of mine has a very unhealthy man-crush on him. “That’s my boy,” he announced, “he was the man in 2002 and he’s going to get it done.” It turns out he was right. Everyone’s favorite cabbage patch doll (Lee Chun-soo) got off a nice strike following a foul and … GOALLLLLLLLLLLL! I was ready to down my glass of beer but our spirit manager had a grander idea:

(Click photo for video)**

Translation: Everyone! Let’s all raise our glasses!

I liked this guy. A few minutes later he stood up again and shouted, “Everyone! These foreigners here are not even Korean, yet they came here wearing red clothing in support of our team. Let’s all drink in their honor!”

At this point the atmosphere was rocking. As an added bonus, the owner of the bar got caught up in the moment and offered everyone a free bottle of Budweiser for each Korean goal. S-WEET! I decided to capture the mood on video for all of you to see. (Okay, I’ll admit, I wanted to capture my two new female friends as well, but I honestly was trying to capture the mood. Straying from the subject for a moment, one of the funny things about filming with a digital camera is that people think you are taking a photo. That was the case here.)

(Click photo for video)**

Soon after, Korea scored the go-ahead goal and it just got even crazier. The only downer of the evening was that Jeon Ji-hyun’s boyfriend rocked in with about ten minutes remaining in the game. But even that may turn into a positive, as his insistent pouting over something led to a fight with Jeon Ji-hyun and they ended up storming out of the bar. With any luck, she’ll be free for the next game.

My new friends and I stuck around for the first half of the France-Switzerland game. I decided at halftime to wander the streets and soak up the mood. It was a good decision. Every block or so I had people running up to me offering me cans of beer, candy, jerky, and more. My co-worker had left with his friend after the Korea game for another bar. I called to find out where he was and told him to come outside to meet me. While I was waiting for him, another group of friendly strangers started talking to me. They were seated outside of a small restaurant watching the second game. They offered my friend and I chairs and we sat down and watched the rest of the game with them. After the game we all went to a noraebang (singing room). All said, it was a great night. One peculiar thing I noticed, though, is that as the night wears on and the drinking persists, it seems to take a toll on certain individuals’ capacity to make a “V” for photos. Have a look:

A lot of people complain about the overzealousness of Korean fans during the World Cup. Admittedly, “DHMK” and “Oh, pilsung Korea” can grow tiring real quick when they’re being sung over and over two years after the fact. But my advice during the World Cup is: Embrace the mood. Plunge headfirst into the River of Red and let the current take you where it may. It’s quite a fun experience.

*To my non-North American reader(s), is this term appropriate?
**For some reason, the video is choppy and the final second or two is cut off when you play it for the first time. (At least on my computer.) Just close the window and open it again to see it all.

It was only a matter of time. Pringles Potato Chips has launched a new campaign of advertising on single chips. Really now, what consumer (pun intended) wouldn’t appreciate making informed decisions while munching on chips, watching Survivor, and scratching their parts? Imagine Al Bundy, if you will. The potato chip maker is easing its way into this new realm with little mini-quizzes. Have a look.

Not to be outdone, Korean kimchi makers have taken things a step further, providing video advertising on plates of kimchi. Don’t believe me? See for yourself.

There you have it. Just remember, too much kimchi is not good for health.

I took the bus from Seoul to Yeosu today. If the traffic is good, it’s about a five-hour ride. Fortunately for passengers such as myself, the buses now have satellite television. Unfortunately for passengers such as myself, the programming is lacking.

This evening’s treat was a KBS music program that parades a number of past-their-prime celebrities singing old hits, somewhat talented amateurs doing covers of songs, and other performers doing, well, unusual performances.

Meet the Soprano Man. I was awoken by his crooning. Eyes closed, I listened to who I thought was a woman singing opera. Upon opening my eyes, I realized that I’d stumbled across a post that may make The Party Pooper jealous. I jumped out of my seat and fumbled through my bag for my video camera. Unfortunately, by the time I was ready to film, the Soprano Man had finished his opera piece. But I was still able to capture his rendition of “Over the Rainbow”.

While watching the video, please keep in mind that I was sitting at the back of the bus and had to zoom in on the television, which accounts for the excessive movement of the camera everytime the bus went over a bump. Also, you might want to turn your speakers up a tiny little bit. (Only a little bit! God forbid anyone should catch you listening to this man.)

My friend asked me to videotape his daughter’s birthday party this afternoon.  Contrary to what the video (click the photo) might suggest, the kids were well-behaved and I had a nice time.  The children, who are first graders, even treated me to these gems:

Child A: Are you Korean or a foreigner?
Me: What do I look like?
Child A: You look Korean.
(If you’ve ever seen me, you’d know how funny that comment is.)

Child B: What’s your name?
Me: My name is Scott.
Child C: What’s your Korean name?
Me: My Korean name is Seo Jin-woo.
Child B (to the other children): Hey! His real name is Seo Jin-woo!

I also noticed that Korean children start “V-ing” at a very early age.

The waitresses’ mannerisms were incredibly feminine and delicate, more so than even South Korean women. Granted, the fact that these women were afforded the opportunity to live and work abroad suggested they were certainly from families of status. Still, one couldn’t help but sense their gracefulness.

Much like many South Koreans one meets, it took the North Koreans a bit of time to warm up to us. No doubt we weren’t the first Caucasians to have a meal at this restaurant, but there was an undeniable awkwardness when we first sat down. Of course, the fact that we were wielding video cameras might have had something to do with that.

Once they discovered we could speak Korean, we felt like we were back in Seoul. Suddenly they became fascinated with us and showered us with familiar comments and questions.

“Wow! It’s amazing that you speak Korean!”
“Where did you learn it?”
“Why did you learn Korean?”
“It’s interesting to talk with a foreigner in Korean.”

And so on. The notable difference being that they simply said “our language” (우리말) rather than refer to Korean as hanguguh (한국어) or hangugmal (한국말).

It was a challenge trying to decipher their thick North Korean accent, but we picked up some interesting tidbits from our conversation. First, we learned that, contrary to what many South Koreans have told us, the waitresses did indeed use some English in the course of speaking Korean. Words like “television” and “air con” (air conditioner). It’s quite possible that they were using these words for our convenience. But they spoke them without pause, which suggested to me that they were accustomed to using them.

Another thing we learned was that these particular women showed signs of being aware of Seoul’s economic growth. They asked us many questions about life in Seoul. What did the women wear? How big were the department stores? Were there many cars on the streets? It made me wonder what is discussed in North Korean homes.

We noticed that there was a karaoke machine in the corner of the restaurant, so after dinner we asked if we could sing some songs. The waitresses were amused by this. Apparently it wasn’t often that they received a performance from Americans. I grabbed the mic and sang a South Korean song while the waitresses smiled and clapped their hands in rhythm. Strike one up for détente.

Because we were guests and these women were, after all, only waitresses, we avoided controversial topics. But I couldn’t help asking one woman a potentially dodgy question. “Why do North Koreans hate the U.S. so much?” I knew that it was a stupid question but I just wanted to hear what she would say. As it turns out, she said nothing. She just gave me a wry smile and asked me if I wanted more water. Oh well. I guess you can’t solve all of the world’s problems over dinner.

Click photo for video

The main reason I decided to use my own webhost was to upload video without having to route through YouTube or Google Videos.  I’m still in the process of figuring out the necessary steps to uploading and linking videos but once things get rolling, expect to see some interesting vids.

This is a short video of the pavillion near Jonggak Station that holds the Boshingak Bell.  Actually, it is not the original bell.  It has been moved to to the National Museum of Korea.  The original bell was made in 1468 and used to be tolled 33 times at 4 o’clock every morning and 28 times every evening.  Imagine living in that neighborhood, huh?  Now it is rung 33 times at midnight of the new year.

Click photo for video

I know I’m stating the obvious, but Yeosu certainly cannot compete with Seoul when it comes to nightlife. Though I can’t say I’ve been out and about enough to start a travel guide, so far I’ve only come across two bars that wouldn’t fall under the category of “hof”. The same is true for nightclubs as well. There is no shortage of nightclubs, but the only ones I’ve seen are of the “booking” variety. That said, I visited one Friday night and discovered a performer doing a passable rendition of Hyori’s “Get Ya”. I apologize in advance for the excessive movement of the camera. I blame it on the alcohol.