The Iceberg

Nice article (admittedly from a few months ago) in the LA Times on Vietnam’s Ha Long Bay - truly a site to behold.

If you’ve ever been there and were sufficiently impressed, you can vote for Ha Long Bay as one the “new seven wonders of nature”.

For some reason, I felt like putting on Al Green’s “Let’s Get Married”.

lets-get-married

Enjoy.

(And Happy Birthday Buddha!)

I was reading the latest in a long history of arguments over the supposed moral superiority of Korean society at The Marmot’s Hole - for the record, I’m in the “baduk and wjk are full of shit out of touch” camp - when I remembered a story told to me back in the day by a couple of my co-workers. I’ll share it with you now.

It was some time around the turn of the 21st century and it involved two co-workers of mine. To avoid confusion, I’ll refer to the co-workers as “Mr. A” and “Mr. B”.

Mr. A had been dating a woman for about three weeks. One weekend he asked me if I’d like to go on a double date with the two of them and his girlfriend’s best friend. For reasons that now escape me I was unable to join them, so Mr. A instead invited Mr. B.

It seems that the night of the double date Mr. B and the best friend hit it off quite nicely. The four of them went back to Mr. A’s place for drinks and an hour or so later the best friend and Mr. B scurried off to his place.

As guys who have not reached full maturity (which in my case no longer applies, thank you very much) are prone to do, Mr. A and Mr. B shared with each other what occurred in each other’s rooms that night. Suffice to say, both couples had done the deed.

Fast forward a few days. Mr. A and Mr. B came over to my place for some beers. I’ll now paraphrase what they said were conversations that took place between the respective couples.

CONVERSATION ONE

Mr. A’s Girlfriend (AG) - I feel so guilty.
Mr. A - Why?
AG - Because you and I had sex, but my friend and your friend only went back to his room and talked that night.
Mr. A - Why do you think that? Maybe she’s not being truthful with you.
AG - Of course she is. She’s my best friend. She would never lie to me.
Mr. A - Did you tell her that we had sex?
AG - Of course not! She would think that I’m easy.

CONVERSATION TWO

Mr. B’s Date (BD) - I feel so guilty.
Mr. B - Why?
BD - Because you and I had sex, but my friend and your friend only stayed in his room and talked.
Mr. B - Why do you think that? Maybe she’s not being truthful with you.
BD - Of course she is. She’s my best friend. She would never lie to me.
Mr. B - Did you tell her that we had sex?
BD - Of course not! She would think that I’m easy.

There was a time when I used to shake my head and roll my eyes in disbelief at such stories - and there were many of a similar vein. Not because I didn’t believe the story, mind you, but because I was dumbfounded that such an environment really existed. But now I no longer care. After all, it’s not my psychosis. This issue is now the sole possession of people like baduk and wjk. And to anyone who is confronted with their sort of prattle my advice would be to nod your head, say “Uh huh,” and move on.

According to market research group GFK (Asia Branch) Samsung is the leading brand in Vietnam for LCD televisions and computer screens while LG is considered tops in home audio systems and air conditioners.

Nokia leads the way in the cell phone market, though that could change down the road as Samsung has unveiled plans to build its first mobile phone plant in Vietnam - with an estimated investment of $670 million.

(Yes, this is the first of what will likely be many Vietnam-related posts.)

Photos from early and late afternoon today. The first seven were taken while on the bus to Costco and the rest were taken around Anyang First Street.

…to those of you seeking the path to peace and tranquility: On a beautiful Sunday afternoon, do not - I repeat - DO NOT go to Costco!

I think the mutated gene which makes Koreans susceptible to mad cow disease has also played havoc with their peripheral vision. I don’t know how else to explain why so many people like to park their carts in the middle of an aisle so that others can’t get around them. God DAMN I cannot emphasize enough how irritating that is. I mean, when I want to stop to look over an item, I make it a point of finding an out-of-the-way spot to park my cart. That is the natural thing to do, isn’t it?

The carts parked (sometimes sideways) in the middle of the aisle combined with people shouting on their cell phones in the dining area was nearly enough to drive me insane. It made me want to go home, lock the door, close all of the windows, turn on the fan, and cook up some American top sirloin. Serious stuff, I tell you. Fortunately, American cow meat has yet to hit the shelves, or I might just have done it.

On a positive note, my home is now restocked with V8 and grapefruit juice.

I was just reading that - after the Indiana and North Carolina primaries - Obama now has 1840.5 delegates, which leaves him just 184.5 delegates shy of the Democratic nomination. Clinton part deux has 1684 delegates.

Which brings to mind a couple of thoughts.

1. With Hillary needing to win 341 of the remaining 487 delegates (and superdelegates) - which is slightly over 70 percent - it’s looking pretty grim for the former first lady. It’s time to step aside, Mrs. Clinton. It’s time.

2. How the hell did Obama win half a delegate? Is Rhode Island really so small that it was only alloted a half of a delegate? Is there a politically influential dwarf lurking somewhere in the shadows? Did someone with no arms and legs cast his support behind Obama (which would be hard to do since he has no arms)? And is some poor sap going to have to step up and offer to chop himself in half in order to make it a round number in the end?

God, politics are difficult.

Oh what the hell. I suppose now is as good a time as any to announce this.

The Iceberg is tying the knot. In early June (providing all of the paperwork gets completed).

I’m going to shy away from too much (specific) personal information. And - please - no smart-alecky comments (joking or not) about the future Mrs. Iceberg (though I’m fair game). Believe it or not, I do have limits.

I saw Iron Man last Friday afternoon. It wasn’t bad - and this is coming from someone who is not a fan of the comic book superhero movie genre.

Here were my impressions:

1. Our students had just finished their final mid-term exam, so the theater was crawling with adolescents decked out in their school uniforms. Which was fine except that they ate about half of my popcorn while I was waiting to enter the theater. Little cretins.

Just kidding, our students are (mostly) great.

2. Dug Robert Downey Jr.

3. Appreciated the attempt to build a storyline and decent dialogue.

4. Was that really Jeff Bridges? Didn’t realize it until about 15 minutes in.

5. Cool Iron Man suit.

6. Would have liked to have seen a little more Iron Man action (attempts at storyline notwithstanding).

7. Gwyneth Paltrow. Mmehh.

8. Osama - You payin’ attention?

9. Black Sabbath rocks!

On a scale of 1 to 5 (1: avoid at all costs; 2: see it if you want, but don’t say i recommended it; 3: not bad if you’ve got time to spare; 4: if you’re like me you’re gonna like it; 5: must see), I give Iron Man a solid “3″.

Since I’m on the subject, I decided to put together a list of some superhero comic book movies with The Iceberg’s personal ratings.

Flash Gordon (5) - “Flash….aaaahhhh!”…’Nuff said.

Batman (5) - Jack Nicholson’s Joker is still the coolest villain yet. Interested to see Heath Ledger’s Joker.

X2 (X-Men 2) (5) - A little biased because this was the first dvd I bought for my home theater system. Cool on surround sound.

Superman (5) - What can I say? Good popcorn-eating movie.

Batman Begins (4) - Christian Bale is the coolest Batman. Good cast. Might have given it a “5″ except that I originally bought the dvd in Thailand and it kept stopping midway through. As a result I didn’t see the end of the movie for about three months.

Superman II (4) - Not quite sure why I like this movie. Perhaps because, when I first saw it, there was a preview of the war movie “The Big Red One”, which was cause for a lot of snickers at the time.

Iron Man (3) - Read impressions above.

X-Men (3) - Liked X2 much more.

Hulk (3) - Saw this movie with my nephew. Liked it much more than I expected. I usually hate movies that overemphasize computer graphics, but for some reason this one didn’t bother me.

X-Men: The Last Stand (3) - The X-Men series is the strongest, in my opinion.

Ghost Rider (2) - Didn’t have high expectations for this movie, so wasn’t disappointed. Motorcycles were cool.

Batman & Robin (2) - Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze. Not good. Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy. Good.

Batman Forever (2) - Tommy Lee Jones’ character pissed me off.

Superman Returns (2) - I remember seeing a clip of the airplane falling from the sky and thought it was really cool. Later, when I saw the movie, I found it didn’t keep my attention.

Spider-Man 2 (2) - The best of the worst comic book superhero series.

Superman III (1) - Richard Pryor. Nice try.

Batman Returns (1) - Danny DeVito’s character REALLY pissed me off.

Hellboy (1) - Like Ghost Rider, my expectations were low…and they were met.

Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1) - I saw this movie. I’m sure of it. But I don’t remember anything about it.

Spider-Man 3 (1) - After watching Spider-Man 2, I thought that perhaps “3″ would be alright. Nope.

Spider-Man (1) - Positively inane. Story: stupid. Dialogue: forced. Graphics: lacking. The only redeeming feature from this movie was watching twenty-something Korean guys pretending to shoot webs out of their wrists after the lights in the theater came on.

Catwoman (1) - Horrible. Though Haley Barry was, well, you know.

Daredevil (n/a) - Haven’t seen it.

Fantastic Four (n/a) - Haven’t seen it, though I don’t know why. Because Jessica Alba is, well, you know.

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (n/a) - Haven’t seen it.

Today is Children’s Day, the day when parents take time off of work to nurse hangovers share quality time with their young ones. Keeping with the spirit of the holiday, here is Offspring’s “The Kids Aren’t Alright”.

offspring-the-kids-arent-alright

Happy Children’s Day everyone. Avoid those amusement parks.